This is one of those topics that can get really deep, and in some respects, somewhat difficult for me. You see, if you paid attention to my first two days of truth, you probably noticed that I have a tendency to find fault in myself and accept blame even for things that I have ABSOLUTELY no control over.
Those words having been spoken, I probably should forgive myself for that… but that forgiveness is for another time, on some other day.
Something pressing in my life that I must forgive myself about is the times with my children that I have lost my temper and not walked away, AND for the times when I allowed others who had lost their tempers to negatively act upon those little people most precious and dear to me. I am their Mother, their Caregiver, their Protector, and their Guide. I often failed to do my job in the past. Sometimes I failed BIG TIME!! And even though some challenges have been completely unavoidable, I have moments where I want to just BAWL for what my children have gone through.
…And I still feel as though I fail E.V.E.R.Y. D.A.Y!!
The difference between today and the past is not truly that significant. But at the same time, I think it is HUGE!!
The difference is that today, as I struggle with my children, my job, my spirituality, my college course-work, my housework, my broken down car, and my personal health, I know that I am pressing forward and doing better. The choices I make are moving my family, and my-self, towards a better tomorrow. That makes TODAY superior to yesterday, and tomorrow will be even more amazing!
Though I will never forget losing my own temper or not stepping in when someone else did; I can forgive. I will forgive… I DO Forgive.
Wow.
What a load off.
Forgiveness is Amazing, and such a gift from our Savior!! Love it!
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